IM Game

Last night my date got out of the soaked sheets we were lolling around in and announced that she would now change the sheets, clean the kitchen, and do the dishes from our dinner. I love my life.

That was our second date. The first one happened the night of the day we met online. I don’t do a whole lot of online game, but sometimes I find it’s a fun diversion. I work best in realtime, so I tend to go with IM. This was on a free dating site. She’s mid 20s, bi, natural pale redhead. A couple things to notice below are mirroring her interest level and sexual innuendo, two things I’m always doing in interactions with women, but especially over IM. Notice her compliance increase as the interaction develops. Encouraging that compliance with subtle (mostly soft) game ended up with her at my kitchen sink in her tight dress and dish gloves. Did I mention I love my life?

—–

(4:46:51 pm)Me:contact solution + tequila, my fav drink [putting 2 random things from her profile together]

(4:47:00 pm)Her:ha.

(4:47:11 pm)Me:whats yours

(4:47:15 pm)Her:I bet you drink it only in bathrooms though.

(4:47:22 pm)Her:high end vodka

(4:47:26 pm)Her:or green tea

(4:47:34 pm)Her:or scotch

(4:47:34 pm)Me:now ur talkin, love me the tea

(4:47:40 pm)Her:or xxx

(4:47:53 pm)Me:i have FRESH xxx in my fridge door

(4:48:09 pm)Her:Good for you.

(4:48:17 pm)Me:ever had it

(4:48:24 pm)Her:not yet

(4:48:36 pm)Me:thought not or else u wouldnt dare to be nonplussed

(4:50:22 pm)Her:verdad

(4:51:07 pm)Me:it’s ridiculously good, you can try it when you come over for tea

(4:51:19 pm)Her:great, thanks.

(4:52:03 pm)Me:better than [stuff she was eating in a photo]

(4:52:19 pm)Her:Indeed.

(4:52:53 pm)Me:whose piano is that

(4:53:07 pm)Her:my parents

(4:53:12 pm)Her:That is in their house.

(4:53:42 pm)Me:your parents rock

(4:53:57 pm)Her:Tell me more about your turntables.

(4:54:05 pm)Her:They try to rock actually.

(4:54:20 pm)Her:Love them some music.

(4:54:47 pm)Me:i like to rub them back and forth

(4:55:00 pm)Her:awesome

(4:55:02 pm)Her:and dirty

(4:56:04 pm)Me:you just described my weekend in vegas

(4:56:25 pm)Her:good to know.

(4:56:51 pm)Her:I just updated my virus protection and firewall so you don’t give me anything.

(4:57:02 pm)Her:I appreciate your honesty.

(4:57:38 pm)Me:safe scratching is one thing i don’t compromise on

(4:57:50 pm)Me:i only spin with protection

(4:57:54 pm)Her:good to hear

(4:59:00 pm)Me:whats the last awesome dirty thing you did

(5:00:11 pm)Her:I rewatched Little Mermaid with a group of friends and when Ariel turned into a human for the first time I said, “Hey Ariel, curtians match the drapes?”

(5:01:50 pm)Me:you’d look hot as a mermaid

(5:02:26 pm)Her:Thanks, I was a mermaid for halloween when I was in grade school

(5:02:32 pm)Her:What is the last awesome dirty thing you did?

(5:03:49 pm)Me:i met this redhead mermaid on xxxdatingsite for tea, and we got naughty in a saltwater bathtub

(5:03:55 pm)Her:I also made out at xxx venue if you wanted a sexy dirty example.

(5:03:57 pm)Her:hahahah.

(5:04:48 pm)Her:and when I say sexy dirty, I mean PG-13.

(5:05:16 pm)Me:brb.

(5:10:35 pm)Me:back. pg 13 huh … i prefer rated R kisses

(5:11:03 pm)Her:yeah, but you can’t give it all away early.

(5:12:31 pm)Me:yes, i like to take my time … let the tension build and build. till that little nub of excitement grows into a huge explosion

(5:12:58 pm)Her:yes. A lot of American Life is missing set up/foreplay etc.

(5:14:01 pm)Me:our culture is adolescent. i prefer more adult themes

(5:14:37 pm)Her:yes, but often times people can’t meet you there and they don’t understand.

(5:15:38 pm)Me:thats why i test for wavelength compatibility. what are you to today

(5:16:27 pm)Her:uh, depends on the conversation/situation I suppose.

(5:17:26 pm)Me:typo^^ what are you up to today

(5:18:24 pm)Her:worked on an advertisement flyer

(5:18:49 pm)Her:slept too late, thinking about walking to xxx for produce before it gets dark

(5:19:53 pm)Her:planning on making some lists later tonight so I have more structures to my day and I can rebel against myself and the structure I set up so I can thrive and continue to procrastinate by way of doing other things that need to also be completed, etc.

(5:19:55 pm)Her:and you?

(5:20:52 pm)Me:hehe sounds neurotic in a cute way.

(5:21:01 pm)Her:that is me

(5:21:48 pm)Me:i need to finish this song’s bridge before dark. tonite i want to go grab a drink at a dive bar

(5:22:20 pm)Her:yeah, right. There are hardly any dive bars in LA…that are truly divey by midwest standards anyway.

(5:22:28 pm)Her:yeah, bridges!

(5:22:35 pm)Me::D love em

(5:22:50 pm)Her:any suggestions?

(5:23:16 pm)Me:let’s chat about it over a drink at xxx bar say 9:00?

(5:24:35 pm)Her:alright.

(5:25:15 pm)Me:cool. its on xxx st and has a new awning

(5:25:30 pm)Me:my names LA Phil btw

(5:26:51 pm)Her:My name is Hotredhead.

(5:28:28 pm)Me:pleasure digitaling you. also my # is ##########

(5:29:51 pm)Her:alright. Good luck taking it to the bridge…technically you already took it to the bridge, so good luck composing/building the bridge.

(5:30:27 pm)Her:I promise to be the whitest one there. That is how you will know it is me.

(5:31:00 pm)Me:i have longer hair now btw

(5:31:39 pm)Me:what is your number

(5:31:59 pm)Her:##########

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1 Response to “IM Game”


  1. 1 Adam April 10, 2010 at 1:41 am

    Hey, I’m 16 and 5’5″, and man you are an inspiration. Don’t stop 🙂


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